In my last blog I talked about getting your body ready for IVF, or in my case Natural IVF.
In this edition we will address the work we can do to prepare our mind and soul for IVF. I get that this is really a personal topic, and we all have our own preferences, so I will share what I’m personally doing. Infertility is such an emotional roller coaster. One moment you feel fine and the next you want to crawl into a cave and lock the world out. We either learn coping skills or we suffer in silence even more so. Here are my coping skills. Help yourself to anything that may serve you on your journey.
Sometimes crying, and I mean sobbing is how I cope. I like to allow myself to feel the emotions, deal with them and try to heal the hurt – FEEL, DEAL, HEAL.
I am not personally a religious person, but I am spiritual so when my Dad asked me if I wanted to go to a healing prayer night, I said yes begrudgingly. Everyone placed their hands on my stomach and prayed over me. I’m glad I went because if nothing else, I was surrounded by love and support. That sums up how I am coping and preparing- love and support. Sometimes I get the love and support from my husband, or friends, sometimes it is from a professional, and other times it’s from me. I actually joined a “spirit baby communication” group where we would meditate and talk to our future babies. It may sound crazy to some, but it felt really good to connect in such a profound way. I also find that to journalism my thoughts is a nice way to get it off my chest. That’s when my YouTube channel became like therapy to me. Be sure to subscribe to my channel if you haven’t already.
Taking a break from worrying and over thinking
In addition to journalism, I exercise in nature – hiking for example, to get fresh air and take a brain-cation. Sometimes we need a break from the constant worrying and over thinking. Then there are other times when we need to face our fears head on. Here is a game that I play alone in my head to face the bad thoughts. Technically it’s not alone because I play with the fearful thoughts that come up. I call this game, “And then what”. Here is how it works. A fearful thought will enter my mind and soul:
Fearful thought: There’s a chance this round of natural IVF won’t work and I won’t get pregnant.
And then what?
Me: Well, if it doesn’t work the first round, we will give it a few more cycle tries.
Fearful thought: Yeah, and it might not work even after that’s all said and done.
And then what?
Me: If I do not conceive with natural IVF I will go the route of adoption.
Fearful thought: Yeah, but then you won’t get to experience pregnancy or labor or the birth of your own biologically related child.
And then what?
Me: With adoption, though it won’t be biologically my child, I will be a mommy, I will have a baby, we will be a family and I will have the life I have longed for and we will love each other just the same.
And then what?
Me: And then we lived happily ever after so shut up fearful thoughts, this game is over and I am the winner!
I usually giggle at myself, and feel better after I finish playing this “game” in my head.
If this isn’t enough to help me get through the day, I also take a naturally based supplement called Confianza (available at this link 40% off)
Confianza is an anti- stress formula that Improves your mental focus and concentration, fights fatigue, and helps your body cope with all the stress infertility (and life) throws at you. This naturally based supplement increases your energy levels, and it’s special blend of herbs provides a safe way to enhance your body’s ability to cope with all forms of stress: physical, emotional, and environmental.
I hope this helps you get through the fertility roller coaster, be kind to yourself.
Sometimes we have to mother ourselves in the process of becoming a mother. What would a wonderful mother do for her child that is struggling?…..she would hug her and love her. It’s your turn to receive that love and support, you deserve it.
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